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Topic: Being yourself? (Read 308 times)

Paetar
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Being yourself?
« Thread Started on Apr 25, 2009, 10:41am »

OK, I just got back from "the school of human rights" (a seminar/workshop) in Selce (cute little town on a seashore). And man, have I grown. I think I've become more mature, got great attitude about life and people in general.

Besides having the BEST people around me ever, learning a lot and enjoying myself for ten days, I got these two attitudes that really sum it up for me:

1. Be yourself. - This one I got from my roommate, true natural. He said that any "social scale" is stupid and pointless, that you should always strive to be yourself - your best self - and not care about anything else. I think that a person can "adapt" it to himself by defining clearly WHAT he wants to be (perhaps fit a stereotype - attractive one) and behave accordingly. Fake it till you make it? No. Make it with ease, because that's who you are. Every other behavior is fake.
Also, with this goes; Find out what you like doing and do it. Anything BUT sarging.

2. Every person is DIFFERENT. But they all have equal rights. President, CEO, shop assistant, murderer... everyone. They all deserve the same dignity. REGARDLESS of some "social scale" they might be on.

Concentrate on these two points and it should pay off. At least it did for me.

BTW: It also gave me a tremendous boost of confidence when I learned how to solve conflict in a non-violent way. That, and my roommate taught me few tricks judo tricks.

Try to learn it too, because then you won't be afraid to do the things you would want to.

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nutrick
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Re: Being yourself?
« Reply #1 on Apr 25, 2009, 11:18am »

good points paetar. it's all about not judging people on the surface and treating each of them equally. aha judo's kick ass, i got boxing under my belt

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Paetar
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Re: Being yourself?
« Reply #2 on Apr 25, 2009, 6:51pm »

Oh and one more thing.

You might wonder where this incorporates chicks. OK, my attitude is this;

I'm being myself. If she doesn't like me for that, then she may fuck off. If she likes me, we'll have a quality time together.

Basically, if she's not attracted it's her problem. The odd thing is, there aren't many that wouldn't be attracted.

One thing though... I need to learn how to properly escalate. Now that they are attracted, and rapport takes care of itself (man, I think it's internalised in me, in last two years there have been 0 people who wouldn't like me upon meeting me - not counting jealous and insecure guys), I could use any tips on escalating properly.
Although, as all the things in my game so far, it will probably take care of itself after enough experience.
So far, I always have the frame that I like her and she likes me, and that I'm trying to escalate. BUT once again, there are big problems in isolation. As always.

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nutrick
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Re: Being yourself?
« Reply #3 on Apr 26, 2009, 1:12am »

kino early, get her comfortable with you physically. lead her places, if she says no, quickly change the subject and get her more comfortable by making her laugh. let it flow naturally. , it's all about doing it gradually. patience =]

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harrymark
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Re: Being yourself?
« Reply #4 on Dec 5, 2011, 6:16am »

If you teach people to keep their eyes upon what others think of them,
unthinkingly to lead the lives and hold the principles of the majority
of their contemporaries, you must discredit in their own eyes the
authoritative voices of their own souls. They may be docile citizens;
they will never be men and women.

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