Being fun.

[Monkora]

Is there anything I can do to be more fun? I read over in relationships a list of date ideas in another sub forum which were all very good but I can't imagine myself doing any of them with just one girl and initiating the 'adventures'. I don't know how to explain. That sort've thing just naturally isn't my thing - My type of fun is making remarks that amuse me, cheap puns and stuff I do love being taken for an adventure, I'm just rubbish at doing it myself.

The few 1 on 1 outings I've been on have been a bit awkward tbh, the girl goes silent and expects me to do something and I have NO idea what to do, how to make it fun. I end up having nothing to say - anyone know how to fix this also?

I've got perhaps 2 potential 'dates' meetups or w/e ready to go I can 'game' (hate that word) for a little bit but I can't be 'FUN'. As much as I try (and I really do) people often tell me I need to brighten up.

Can anyone help? Thanks heaps.

[Paetar]

OK, I'll help. For me, this works;

-The question game
-Mystery's kiss close "Do you want to kiss me" (I've had either a yes, maybe, or LJBF. Win every time.)
-(or if it doesn't work) - "On the scale 1-10, how good of a kisser are you?" "Prove it."
I know couple of routines that can help. That's for isolation. And don't be afraid to stack, some girls just need time to realize that they want it.

And about being fun? It's easy, actually. You need to be in the mood. I've been non-stop grumpy before and now I just... feel better. Not only about myself; but about the world.

Confidence, confidence, confidence.
Easiest, surest, hardest and "truest" way to gain it; do something. Be good at something. Music, sports, movies (not watching though), books, knowledge, whatever you like. You got to love yourself first, for only then the others may too. (This sounds like some kind of quote or something, it just came off my mind. I'll put it in sig.). When you feel you are really good at something valuable to people ('cause ANOYNE can listen to songs, but not everyone can play Metallica and Judas Priest), you will think that they will want to be around you more.

Here's the point; People "like people who give them value" (simpler; who make them feel good). And everyone says "so then give them value, and they'll like you, and you'll get more confidence." Well, it doesn't work that way.
They might like you, but you don't see any real value in YOURSELF.... so naturally you'll think that no one SHOULD like you and that you don't deserve those people... so you'll try harder and harder. Wrong way. You have to have value to give it away. It's stupid, irrelevant, completely made-up and useless. But you have to feel confident about yourself. Confidence is nothing and everything at the same time.
SO only once you are sure about your status in group (in your friends), you can truly relax (or is it just my case? IDK) and be open minded, which is essential for having good time. And then ANYTHING you say is fun and interesting.

You know, when you're talking to people, if your status is high enough they'll eat most of the lines you throw at them. If you're the alpha, you can talk about anything and it'll be cool. On the other hand, if you're not, it depends on the alpha to decide if your topic is fun or not.

SO if you've got her alone (and I understand that you have it planned), your status is set. She likes you enough to be with you alone, and that's a serious thing (overlooked many times). She WILL WANT TO BE ENTERTAINED. AND SEDUCED.
I don't know who it was, but someone once said "Women are spectators in their seduction. They want to be seduced, they'll even support you, but they'll do nothing actual to help you. And if you blow it, they'll say 'Aww too bad' and carry on."
So if she wants it, what's the problem? Just talk about something. ANYTHING. Offer something from your life that might interest her. Play the question game. DO IT, it's great. After all, words are only 7 percent, much more important is body language.

Sorry for the long post, It's 2 AM and I get talkative (writative?) when I'm tired.

[Monkora]

What's the question game? I'm sure I've read about it before.

[Volt]

Can you drive?

[Monkora]

Yep, but I can't take passengers for another 7 months.

[Paetar]

I think the question game is Style's or Mystery's. It's that you'll play game with her, where you and her ask questions about each other. It's the best way to meet someone, you can't lie, you can't repeat each-other's questions and the questions must be interesting. Google it if you want. Explain this to her and start with the "How many guys were you with" question, it should set the mood. AND she can't ask you how many girls have you been with .

Aww, I wish I could drive. Not 18 yet.

[Monkora]

That sucks. Where I'm from you can drive on your own between 5am and 10pm when your 15 years and 6 months (that's presuming you did all the tests as soon as you could). Can take passengers at 16 years and 6 months (again, only if you took all the tests as soon as you could).

[Grape]

I like to kino at that point. Just a simple "Tickle fight!!!" out of nowhere =]

and then when it comes to the point we're wrestling each other down, kiss =]

[ridiculous]

Jul 20, 2009 8:55:11 GMT -5 Grape said:

I like to kino at that point. Just a simple "Tickle fight!!!" out of nowhere =]

and then when it comes to the point we're wrestling each other down, kiss =]

Haha "tickle fight" reminded me of this:



Pretty funny if you've watched jake and amir before.

[Deleted]

The lying game is better in my opinion. Not only do you show that you're a guy a that loves to have fun, but you can also get a prize most of the time!
It's a win-win situation.

[Zomga48]

Jul 19, 2009 3:44:16 GMT -5 Monkora said:

Yep, but I can't take passengers for another 7 months.

Legally.

[Grape]

Zomga is a badass.

[doonagoowin]

Are they gonna pull you over just because you have people in your car?

Here in Utah, you can't drive anybody around for sex months after you get your license.
Just drive carefully, they can't pull you over just because you have somebody in your car.
I doubt anybody (except parents) really follows that 6 month rule.

[sparkogre]

tl;dr: Become more expressive. Honestly, the best way to learn this is to go overboard and become a dancing monkey temporarily, which will teach you how fucking easy it is to pump BT with dancing monkey. DONT STAY DANCING MONKEY FOREVER


^{Here in Utah, you can't drive anybody around for sex months after you get your license.}

lol, what are we thinking about?


I fucking tell everybody this and nobody listens: go read Revelation by Venutian Arts. That will make you understand.



Most important thing to remember: It's not what you say. It's your delivery. Really. I talk about fucking anything. As long as you're not talking about creepy or gross stuff, then it's fine.


Advice: Go FUCKING OVERBOARD on the delivery. Become a dancing monkey (DM). But only temporarily. Most people I see are WAAAAAY too low energy and unexpressive. Being DM probably won't get you laid, but it will help you calibrate, and you'll realize that you can pump BT a shit-ton.


eDIT: Seriously. Talk about whatever the fuck.

-calculators
-car
-speakers
-favorite pencil company
-favorite pet
-where have you lived
-rock band
-video games (who gives a fuck. if you play dungeons and dragons, talk about dungeons and dragons. As long as you're not the stereotypical d&d player nobody cares. Guys might try and AMOG you, but ignore them or just kind of pretend to be in utter awe of how badass they are for making fun of a video game.)

Another thing I've noticed, is that when you're all expressive and enthuasiastic, there is no awkwardness. Silences are just quiet, not tense and awkward.


Also, if a girl opens up to you and tells you something that is a little odd, DON'T EVER TEASE HER ABOUT IT, EVEN JOKINGLY. EVER EVER EVER