How to Give Value

[SamethP]

ok, this has been annoying me a little bit lately....
i know that giving value is like sincere complements or whatever
but im not understanding what....

how do you give value.
examples would be nice


thankyou ^_^

[Paetar]

A definition that may help (the topic IS confusing): When you are giving value to the person's action or the person itself. Or, in emotional language; giving them good feelings.

Basically, you're giving them worth. Recognizing their effort as worthy. Recognizing them as worthy and good. When you listen to them, you give them value (you're making their effort worthwhile). When you compliment them, you give them value (this is probably the most blunt approach, you may try thinking of something else). When you joke with them, flirt with them, "push them up" (making fun of them in a good way, making them confident), talk with them, play with them, help them (and even better let them help you)... the list goes on and on.

When you do this, people will feel confident around you and like you, follow you; you build your social circle and naturally become a leader. You can do this by simply being interesting, funny, etc... but giving value is much more efficient. After all, why do you hang out with your buddies? Because you feel great around each other. Well this builds on the same prinicple.

[Chris]

Thats good stuff Pae.

Nike and I were talking about this a while ago and he put it in
great words:
"talk to everyone like you are their cool big brother."

[Grape]

Give them IOIs! =]

[Volt]

To guys: Just a quick, sincere compliment (dude, nice shoes) in between ideas, or smiling and laughing extra
To girls: Kino (quick hugs, etc.), body language, just trying to make them feel good
also, this:

"talk to everyone like you are their cool big brother."

[Rusty]

You can do that by making everyone in your group feel better about themselves and making the interactions fun. People having fun are naturally more valueable then people sitting around pissed off. If your making people have fun, your bringing up your value to the group by making them feel good, your bringing up the individuals value in the group by making them happy and so more valueable, your WAY bringing up the group value by raising yours and the groups value.

[optimus]

They're right. Making people have fun around you is a great way to give value, so are sincere compliments.

I try to make them better people. Sometimes I'll teach her how to bowl, or help her (or him, I don't just add value to girls) with her homework, or talk about how I admire her work ethic for doing something. Basically, any action that brings her closer to her goals is vlauable.

[SamethP]

thanks guys that helps a lot
but the problem here is my best mate x]
i swear he's a natural alpha
constantly has the attention of the group yadda yadda
so i dont know what i can do with the current groups, except look like the orbit lawl...

so im thinking go and amog a random group and then introduce my mate after?
ideas?

[Paetar]

hmm, this has been bugging me too.

basically, you can't "beat" (even though that's a bad word) him with a group that he is better with already. if you want the group itself, try to "isolate them" .

What you want to do is to make him give YOU value in a set. You know what I mean, him actually giving you social proof.

How to do it? I don't think that you should tell him directly, better to give him value - build him up and he should build you up.

[SamethP]

youd think so.
but whenever we're with that group, all eyes are on him. even an ex that im on good terms with comes onto him... lol... so im pretty much the tag along... and im sick of it.

im gonna game a random in one of my classes and then amog their group, become the higher value and then introduce him... unless hes already gamed them... =.=

[optimus]

Feb 17, 2009 15:53:45 GMT -5 SamethP said:

youd think so.
but whenever we're with that group, all eyes are on him. even an ex that im on good terms with comes onto him... lol... so im pretty much the tag along... and im sick of it.

im gonna game a random in one of my classes and then amog their group, become the higher value and then introduce him... unless hes already gamed them... =.=

I have the same problem!(link)

I don't know what to do about it. Like, I can take attention for a minute with a story or some shit, but as soon as I finish, everyone's looking back at him.


I think the problem is that he's already proofed the group, and now it's an uphill battle.

I dunno.

[SamethP]

i see what you mean, and i agree completely
i guess these groups that he 'owns' are ones that he was proofed in before me...

so the only way to go is to find a new group and well, infiltrate them

[twotyme]

Too much mental masturbation going on here. if you wana offer value first dont give away ur value. dont ask questions,dont seek value, master vibing, give statements. thats offering value. .and amogs will always be amogs. dont hate the player. peace

[Deleted]

Jun 29, 2010 21:20:58 GMT -5 twotyme said:

Too much mental masturbation going on here. if you wana offer value first dont give away ur value. dont ask questions,dont seek value, master vibing, give statements. thats offering value. .and amogs will always be amogs. dont hate the player. peace

Do you realize that basically all of your reply's have the word mental masturbation in it? Do you even know what that means?

[perceverance]

Jun 30, 2010 12:41:06 GMT -5 @aaron4prez said:

Jun 29, 2010 21:20:58 GMT -5 twotyme said:

Too much mental masturbation going on here. if you wana offer value first dont give away ur value. dont ask questions,dont seek value, master vibing, give statements. thats offering value. .and amogs will always be amogs. dont hate the player. peace

Do you realize that basically all of your reply's have the word mental masturbation in it? Do you even know what that means?

hahaha he wrote it in 4 out of 5 posts, kind of creepy if you ask me.