Making friends with the "popular kids"

[nutrick]

how would i do this without looking like a "try hard" the kids at my school i'm cool with, like i say wsup and stuff, but how do i get them to invite me to parties. would i just ask them what they're doing this weekend and ask if i tag along?

[Keysersoze]

add value to their lives in some way... ie. invite one of them to something they'd really like... ie if theres a guy who loves art, tell him your going to an exhibition and invite him along... as long as your adding value to them, people will always respond well to you...

When I was in year 9 I switched social groups, going from "king of the losers" to "the quiet cool kid", this was a huge jump... what i did without realising the psychology behind it was add value to these people... for example one guy told me how he liked The Libertines (a band) I had a spare ticket and asked him if he wanted to come along, I showed him I was actually a pretty cool guy and he invited me to hang out with them all at lunch... at first some of them WILL NOT want you there but just make friends with the ones who are friendly and the others start to change their mind since everyone else accepts you...

read the reciprocation part:
highschoolpuas.proboards83.com/index.cgi?action=display&board=attraction&thread=1261&page=1#9912


I'm a little drunk right though so I may not make much sense =S

[Grape]

here's the best way to go at it.
find a 'popular kid' that is in your class.
befriend him, it'll take 2-3 days to get him comfortable seeing "oh.. he's really a FRIEND now, not some kid i see at school."
talk to him daily about normal stuff, and then on thursday and friday, ask him what his plans are and tell him things like "ohh.. my plans for friday just got cancelled.. mind if i tag along?"

etc. the more 'popular' kids you befriend the better.
and soon you will know enough people in a circle you will be able to go in, they will welcome you, and boom. social value right off the bat.

<33 Grape

[Alek]

Tell him that you are openly gay, but have options.

Humor is the best seduction. If you can be funny, people will naturally gravitate towards you. Other then that, demonstrate value and show that you aren't needy. Get dem digits, and just ask em what they're doing, and tell em your gonna chill.

And this part is more complicated to write out: Check if you have a "needy" sounding voice. If your voice sounds needy, fix it or even get vocal lessons (seriously).

[Dream]

OMG YOU WENT TO SEE THE LIBERTINES!

I love them, was Pete still with them when you saw them??

[Keysersoze]

Feb 28, 2009 7:31:05 GMT -5 Dream said:

OMG YOU WENT TO SEE THE LIBERTINES!

I love them, was Pete still with them when you saw them??

yea he was... it was the forum in london where they did the "can't stand me now" video... it was shambolic but.... incredible =)

[optimus]

Definitely don't ask them if you can tag along.

Tou can read this, but there's some horrible advice in there.

Basically, do something. Prove to them you do something and add value to their lives.

People have talked about this before: have a passion. It helps you in so many ways.

[Grape]

Optimus, what's so bad about asking a good friend if you can tag along, *hang out*?

[Dream]

I think he means, better to have them tag along with you than you with them

[Grape]

yeah.. well change wording then!
the basic story is that Your plans got cancelled, and you'd like to hang out with a friend whoever it may be.

friends dont care about 'value' in such situations, they care more about rapport.
i hope this makes sense.. the world isn't based purely on value.

[Alek]

Feb 28, 2009 13:03:58 GMT -5 optimus said:

Definitely don't ask them if you can tag along.

Tou can read this, but there's some horrible advice in there.

Basically, do something. Prove to them you do something and add value to their lives.

People have talked about this before: have a passion. It helps you in so many ways.

Hey, that site has some good stuff to it, and has some good articles linking from it. A really good read

[optimus]

Feb 28, 2009 15:11:02 GMT -5 Alek said:

Feb 28, 2009 13:03:58 GMT -5 optimus said:

Definitely don't ask them if you can tag along.

Tou can read this, but there's some horrible advice in there.

Basically, do something. Prove to them you do something and add value to their lives.

People have talked about this before: have a passion. It helps you in so many ways.

Hey, that site has some good stuff to it, and has some good articles linking from it. A really good read

Oh, I love the site - I just hate that article.

[Volt]

what is it? It seems cool

[optimus]

@grape: There are times when tagging along is okay, but asking someone what they're doing this weekend makes it sound like you don't have anything going on. Better to go with yours: "My plans for the weekend fell through. What're you up to?" If he trusts you enough to tell you he's having a party, then it really doesn't matter what you say. It's more important what you say before you ask him.

EIther way, it's proabably even better for a guy to tell you he's having a party than you asking him.

[Grape]

Yeah like I said, change up the wording because it doesn't matter much.
Either way the 'facts' are that your plans fell through and you need something to do.