Post by Andrew on Oct 2, 2008 14:40:45 GMT -5
This is Cajun's Body Language (Part 2), the section on how to deal with AMOGs. This is not my work, you can find the full article here cajunsspice.blogspot.com/2008/01/advanced-body-language-part-2.html
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Put yourself in this situation
You are walking home from the bar one night alone. Up ahead you see a group of 2 rough looking guys who seem to be out to cause trouble. You walk by and they begin verbally assaulting you, you keep walking until they say “Hey you fucking fagot! Look at me when I talk to you!”
What happens?
The coward will run away.
The confident man will match their aggression with his own, and hope that his hand is stronger.
The ideal man, that is, the man who has complete control, will do neither. The ideal man will simply turn around and give the 2 men a look. That look, in all its simplicity, will communicate so much more than any words could possibly achieve. Understand that when men show aggression it’s always reaction seeking. They want a reaction because they need to gauge your limit, they want to read your hand. If you ever watch 2 male lions fighting you will notice something similar;
Before the fight, the beta lion will be just outside the alpha lion’s comfort zone and will begin threatening the alpha lion with roars and turning it’s head sideways to show off it’s teeth. The alpha lion will simply stand there and watch the beta lion. No amount of aggression on the beta lion’s part will affect the alpha lion in any way, he is a rock. If the beta lion moves forward, so does the alpha lion, even more so and without delay. What happens? Unless the beta lion has strength in numbers he will almost always accept defeat, even if he is much bigger than the alpha lion. If the alpha lion shows any sort of reaction to the beta’s aggression then they will almost always fight.
So how does all of this translate out in the field?
Advanced Body Language: Restraint
The simple most subtle reactions are the best.
If you get shit tested hard (ie “why are you talking to us!?”) the best reaction is to not say a word. Simply smile, raise your eyebrows and cock your head back as if a 4 year old just challenged you to a fight in the most verbally insulting (and hilarious) way possible. If she admits defeat with her body language (she will look uncomfortable and not know what to say next) then you need to reward her, kino her and say “You have a lot of confidence, I like that”
Make them show their hand first.
Often, when someone has the confidence to make a threat to someone whose limits they don’t know, they rarely have the confidence to do it twice. So, if a persistent Amog says something insulting like “Uhh dude these girls think you’re gay, you should leave” Simply smile confidently and without missing a beat say “Excuse me?!” then immediately look at the girls with eye code that says “is this guy an idiot?” Look back at the guy in a way that demands a reaction from him. His only option will be to ante up the aggression, in which case, read on…
Actively encourage challengers
Nothing is more frightening to a man than an opponent who actively seeks, and seems to enjoy aggression thrown at him. Be confident in your ability to rise above, always remain calm, cool and collected. An unreactive man is a man who cannot be read, and therefore cannot be beaten.
Amog: “Don’t listen to this guy, he sounds like a fucking idiot”
You: *Big smile* “Im sorry, did you just call me a FUCKING IDIOT?” Hold eye contact, actively expect a response. If he maintains his frame, read on…
Never admit defeat
Never secede from their advances. Always make them ante up their aggression. If it gets to the point where you think they are going to make a scene (which rarely EVER happens) then simply smile, pat them on the back and say “You’re cool dude, you got a lot of confidence, I respect that” this will actually make people like you MORE. True alpha males respect other men who can stand up against them, the same is true for women. This is why you should NEVER admit defeat, take them as far as they can go then respect them for it, everybody wins.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Put yourself in this situation
You are walking home from the bar one night alone. Up ahead you see a group of 2 rough looking guys who seem to be out to cause trouble. You walk by and they begin verbally assaulting you, you keep walking until they say “Hey you fucking fagot! Look at me when I talk to you!”
What happens?
The coward will run away.
The confident man will match their aggression with his own, and hope that his hand is stronger.
The ideal man, that is, the man who has complete control, will do neither. The ideal man will simply turn around and give the 2 men a look. That look, in all its simplicity, will communicate so much more than any words could possibly achieve. Understand that when men show aggression it’s always reaction seeking. They want a reaction because they need to gauge your limit, they want to read your hand. If you ever watch 2 male lions fighting you will notice something similar;
Before the fight, the beta lion will be just outside the alpha lion’s comfort zone and will begin threatening the alpha lion with roars and turning it’s head sideways to show off it’s teeth. The alpha lion will simply stand there and watch the beta lion. No amount of aggression on the beta lion’s part will affect the alpha lion in any way, he is a rock. If the beta lion moves forward, so does the alpha lion, even more so and without delay. What happens? Unless the beta lion has strength in numbers he will almost always accept defeat, even if he is much bigger than the alpha lion. If the alpha lion shows any sort of reaction to the beta’s aggression then they will almost always fight.
So how does all of this translate out in the field?
Advanced Body Language: Restraint
The simple most subtle reactions are the best.
If you get shit tested hard (ie “why are you talking to us!?”) the best reaction is to not say a word. Simply smile, raise your eyebrows and cock your head back as if a 4 year old just challenged you to a fight in the most verbally insulting (and hilarious) way possible. If she admits defeat with her body language (she will look uncomfortable and not know what to say next) then you need to reward her, kino her and say “You have a lot of confidence, I like that”
Make them show their hand first.
Often, when someone has the confidence to make a threat to someone whose limits they don’t know, they rarely have the confidence to do it twice. So, if a persistent Amog says something insulting like “Uhh dude these girls think you’re gay, you should leave” Simply smile confidently and without missing a beat say “Excuse me?!” then immediately look at the girls with eye code that says “is this guy an idiot?” Look back at the guy in a way that demands a reaction from him. His only option will be to ante up the aggression, in which case, read on…
Actively encourage challengers
Nothing is more frightening to a man than an opponent who actively seeks, and seems to enjoy aggression thrown at him. Be confident in your ability to rise above, always remain calm, cool and collected. An unreactive man is a man who cannot be read, and therefore cannot be beaten.
Amog: “Don’t listen to this guy, he sounds like a fucking idiot”
You: *Big smile* “Im sorry, did you just call me a FUCKING IDIOT?” Hold eye contact, actively expect a response. If he maintains his frame, read on…
Never admit defeat
Never secede from their advances. Always make them ante up their aggression. If it gets to the point where you think they are going to make a scene (which rarely EVER happens) then simply smile, pat them on the back and say “You’re cool dude, you got a lot of confidence, I respect that” this will actually make people like you MORE. True alpha males respect other men who can stand up against them, the same is true for women. This is why you should NEVER admit defeat, take them as far as they can go then respect them for it, everybody wins.
