Make a connection. Make her feel beautiful.

[Rusty]

Hey guys =)! Lately I've really been working on connections, on sharing special moments with people that are mine and there's. I felt really empty and lonely for a long long time, and I've realized why. It wasn't always like that, when I was a kid I saw the beauty and wonder in everything and in everyone. I wasn't afraid to express it. Then I grew up and society, with the best intentions imaginable, taught me to forget that and to see what was wrong and needed fixing. I lost the part in me that saw beauty. I became jaded and upset, unconfident, lonely. Then I got into the community, I started out trying to get laid and be cool in peoples eyes and other stuff like that. Then something changed, I realized that there was a greater purpose to life then getting laid and being the cool guy. I realized the beauty in things, and the wonder in the world. I'm so stoked to be alive now. Every breath. Every moment. It's the most wonderful thing. I see the beauty in women, the feminine energy. I let them know about it. I see the real beauty in them. The stuff behind her social mask rubbish. I see the real her, and I love it. Always. And I telegraph that. Women can somehow unconsciously pick up on this, and they trust me. Why wouldn't they? I want nothing from her that I think she would suffer to give me. They trust me, so they open up to me. They trust me enough to have a genuine connection with me. There's no greater accomplishment then that in my eyes. A genuine connection.

So connect with women. Show them their beauty. Enjoy it. Share the moment. There's nothing greater then it. Drop all the masks you have, negs, ego bullshit, all that stuff. Just focus on the interaction and connecting. On seeing the beauty in the world and sharing it with her. I was talking to a girl today, who is one of my closest friends, and she kept leaving to fix her makeup. I told her I thought she was beautiful and I love her regardless of her makeup crap. I told her I wanted to see her, not makeup. She said something like 'Noooo. Your really sweet but I look hideous without makeup'. I then grabbed her, hugged her, leaned back with my hands still around the small of her back and said 'Baby. I've never lied to you. I'm not lying to you now. Your beautiful.' I meant it. She knew I meant it. I saw her lift up a little. We made an awesome connection. I think she loved me more after that. More importantly though, she loved herself more after that. She left a little better then she came. Could I have k-closed her, rang my friends and bragged about it for 3 hours at that time? Absolutely. But there's a grater purpose then that. I hope you guys find that purpose and find the wonder in the world. There's nothing greater. Have fun guys =D

PS. PM me if you wanna have any questions about making greater connections or if you have a little trouble reconnecting with the beauty in the world. PM me if you have questions on anything really and I'll try my best. =D

[SenorBubbz]

Sounds like a lot of work, but it also sounds like it'll pay off.
I don't think everyone can accomplish this though, from the way you say it, they need to be born with a certain mindset...

I'm still confused at how you made this transition though..

[Grape]

Or you COULD just post right here so everyone else can read and learn.

[Rusty]

Senor, no one's born with a mindset. All mindsets are learnt =D! I'm certain that pretty much anyone can accomplish trust and honest, it's a natural thing. It's just when your so caught up in a mindset of taking and are trying to do all these little tricks to talk to her and somehow get her in bed, there is this barrier that is set up between you and her. The reason she cannot trust you or be honest with you is because you don't trust her and aren't being honest with her. It's not so hard to pickup on intentions like that. You WILL come across as dishonest if you being dishonest because that's what you are being, dishonest. If you use an (I say you not as in like you but as in like, a person haha. Sorry man I'll start using I now) opinion opener on a girl, do you really care about her opinion? Do you really care about whether she flosses before she brushes? No. So why are you asking her? Because you want something from her. If your mind is in that mode, your body language will give you away. Does that stuff work sometimes for some people? Absolutely. Why doesn't it work for some people? Because their mind set is all wrong.

So how to make the transition from sneaky pickup guy to a natural? Beliefs. That's the key stuff. Natural's have certain beliefs that allow natural attraction to flow. I'll type some of them up on this thread when I can, but not now haha sorry =D! It is quite a bit of work to undo some of the damage wrong beliefs do, but when those beliefs are uprooted then this stuff goes beyond just rooting chicks and will actually improve your life. Hope I answered your question =D! Have fun man

[virtuoso]

great post. i feel the same way.

[SamethP]

theres your natural game coming through bro
but i feel that this can only be done (to the extent of your example) with someone that you know, so it isnt great for a flimsy pick up lol

i agree, life can feel hollow when there is no trust or honesty. im still experiencing that in some key areas of my life. i hope that i can find a way to see the world as you do man, it sounds amazing.

maybe i can talk to you on msn this weekend?

[Rusty]

Lol absolutely robocop. And to anyone who's interested, my email ad i: [e-mail].

And Grape has a good point. You could also post your questions on this thread so everyone else can read =D

[Amplified]

I love what you've said and I feel like I get it. At the same time, I don't know how to apply this to my interactions.
I really want to understand this. Can you go in deeper explaining this?

[Rusty]

Hey Amp =D! The best way I can explain this is by using the 4EP model off the Attraction Code (which is absolute gold. BUY IT!) The way it works is, there are two main points.

Intention
Expression

Your intention is what your there for. Why are you talking to her? Why are you into this? What is your purpose?

Your expression is just that. Expression. It's how your expressing your intention. Ideally, we want your expression to be completely congruent to your intention.

So why isn't as simple as that? I want ABC. Well, first of all, most of us get our wants fed to us. Either by TV or by our mates, or really even by the PU community. To find your intention, you have to dig a little. Get a list going, which is harder then it sounds. Why are you in this community? What do you want from it? From women? Maybe you don't want to take anything, maybe you just want to share something special (yourself) with the whole world and have been having a little trouble? Maybe you want stronger friendships, find love, respect, confidence? Then, even harder, go through it and sort out your wants the wants everyone else wants you to have. Should take you awhile, not a 5 minute exercise guys. Took me like a week.

So now you have your intention. Good work =D! That's more then most people have. Most people don't know what they want, and end up with all this stuff they don't. That's probably why we have consumerism and Fight Club haha. Remember that as you change, that list may change. It's ok, but remember to take the time to change it.

So why can't you just go out and get what you want now? Well you can. If you happen to have money on that list, kick into school and go for it man. Most of of don't though. Most of the things on that list probably have to do with other people. Respect. Friendship. Love. These are things to be shared by people. Shared. Not taken. When your expression is congruent to your intention, and if your intentions are beneficial for more people other then yourself... people really have no reason to not give you what you want. So they will. If your intention is to share an awesome interaction with a women, and then share a beautiful moment with her that she'll remember for the rest of her life... why would she say no? Exactly. You don't HAVE to share it with her. There are 3 billion women on the planet. But tonight, you choose her. Lucky her.

It is of corse, not as easy as that. There is more to the expression of your intention. Your focus needs to be right.

Focus is where you are placing your attention. Is it, OH MY GOD OH MY GOD DOES SHE LIKE ME?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Or is it 'Hmm. She's cool. I want to get to know her better.'? Your control of focus is something you learn.

Let's analogize a little. Look at your intention like the start of a race and the expression like the end of it. Imagine you are the only person running the race and all you really have to do is finish it to win gold. Look at your expression like the finishing line. Knowing where you need to go and where your starting point is isn't enough. How to get there? Well, you have to run the race. And I don't really need to tell you about focus, if you know what you want and you know that to get it, all you can do (and have to do) is express that want... you will get to the finish line eventually. But then it becomes less like a straight track and more like a maze. Learn focus will be like me giving you a bike with a GPS system and rocket boosters. You gotta learn how to use the bike and rocket boosters (how to control your focus) and how to use the GPS system (what to focus on) but you'll get to the finish line a lot faster. That's the best analogy I can come up with for focus. A bike with GPS and rocket boosters. Yeah. good work King.

How do you determine a good focus during the interaction from a bad one will wreck you? A good focus is directed outwards, that's where the interaction is... that's where the people are. A bad on is an internal focus, where the interaction isn't and the only person that is there is you. Have a focus coming into the interaction. Why are you beginning to interact with this person. She interesting? Focus on her then. Not on your fucking body language or routine. By all means, I think body language is very important. Practice it in-front of a mirror, remind yourself of it when your out. Get that spine straight. Body language is the language of your heart though, if your in a good mood and feel confident you will naturally stand taller and stick your chest out. Women can tell the difference between bullshit body language and real body language. I know. I asked

So recap. Intention is what you want. Focus is where you place your attention. Expression is the expression of your intention. But that's only 3 King! I thought it was ----->4<-----EP. True. There's other piece to the puzzle. State. State is like the motivation for the race. The motivation to finish it. If you don't have motivation to finish it, you'll have a little trouble. It's your emotional state. It's how you feel. It's hard to want to express your wants (which is to be yourself) when you feel like a complete ass. So you want to feel good and energetic. Do what works. Exercise works for me. Tim the Natural does his little 'WOOOO!' thing. Brain Pettit lets the woman get him in the state (which is an awesome idea. It's on my to-do list to try that). Vin describes the highest level of state control as no control. He says that attachment to a certain state is limiting and that you want to eventually allow yourself to be able to interact and express your intention despite your emotional state at the time is the best way to be. He's probably right. I haven't reached that level though so I won't comment on it, only that it's worth a go. I'll set up a post on how to get to the state where you feel awesome and confident though. Not now though, this post is getting too long.

So that's it. MY focus when I want to connect with a woman on a deeper level is just that. That's my purpose, to share a special moment with her. I telegraph the want to share this moment with her. I hardly ever get a no, occasionally though I do haha. Working on it. If I left any holes, post up and tell me about it and it'll try to fill it. =D Good luck guys.