Interesting STORY please...

[locution]

Guys can you help me to think of story topics you can use when sarging.Aplroach is usually easy but in the middle of process I run out of topics and feel awkward afterwards.What should i do not to feel awkward and uncomfortable and what are the best topics and ways that you can do or tell a girl for the both of you to have FUN?

[swatt]

Ask yourself this question:

"What interesting things have I done in my life."

If you can't come up with more than 10 things then you must have locked yourself away your whole childhood. As for not feeling awkward and uncomfortable... Honestly it's okay to feel awkward and uncomfortable. I still feel awkward talking to people I've never met before and when I start escalating with a girl. The more you interact, the less awkward you will feel, but that isn't the point. The more you interact, the more you learn how to DEAL with that awkwardness.

Back when I was first starting to "game" (lol that felt so gay to type haha) girls, I would always take 3 deep breaths before I would "open" (lol) a girl.

[Seven]

Hi Locution,

Let me begin by answering your question about what good topics are for a conversation. Let me tell you that any topic can be good and fun. It's how you talk about it that gives your topic it's energy. Now that that's known let's continue.

Usually when you are having a conversation, you shouldn't wait for a topic to finish and then bring up a new one. In my opinion that just makes the conversation feel forced. What you should do is take newly gained information from your talk with her, and use that to flow into another topic. For example, you could've asked her about what she does for fun/did last weekend and she might mention she likes to play hockey/had dinner at a restaurant. Now, you can go ahead and either,
A; ask more about hockey and why she likes it so much/what she ate and what her favourite food is.
Or, you can
B; tell about what you like to do for fun, and why you like it/what your favourite food is and what restaurant is the best place to get it.

I personally prefer option B since it makes your conversation dynamic and you give her opportunities again to bring up new topics from what you told her. (This is crucial, because it fuels the conversation) Remember, we call it 'talking WITH girls' not 'talking TO girls'. I shouldn't be an interview so keep this in mind.

Use A only when you feel that this is a girl who loves talking about herself more than listening to others, or if you are just genuinely interested. Don't forget to go B afterwards.

Use B most of the time to keep the conversation dynamic and two-sided. If you start using her given information as topic starters, so will she. I can literally talk with girls for hours without awkward pauses on either end doing this.

If no topics are being brought up on both sides you can get the conversation running again by talking about how you feel right now and why for example;"I really like the music here, it makes me feel like I'm full of energy. Don't sometimes feels like that when you hear music you like?" Be creative with the I really like the (...) part. It can be anything. Weather, lighting, smell of rain. Just make sure it suits the environment you're in. Don't talk about the smell of rain when it's not raining. (of course) Be creative.

As for the feeling awkward feeling, you must be caring too much about what people think about you. Feeling awkward is anything emotional state that can only be felt when you are around someone else. No one who is alone can feel awkwardness.
Just accept the feeling, know that it comes from your mimd trying to predict how others view you and your mind comparing your ideal view with the predicted view, finding out they they don't match. No big deal, it doesn't actually affect how people treat you.

I hope this helps and good luck with future talks!

Cheers,

Seven

[amarok]

You have it a little backwards Seven. No, you shouldn't be interviewing her, but you don't want to be talking about yourself either, not in the first bits of interaction. Instead, take the information she gives to flow into new topics about her. She plays hockey? Does she eat a lot of concession foods? What's her favorite place to go out to? Talking about yourself makes it feel like you're either trying to sell yourself to her or are just egotistical. Mix this way of conversing with things like tension loops and you're golden.

[Seven]

Nov 16, 2014 22:39:02 GMT -5 amarok said:

but you don't want to be talking about yourself either, not in the first bits of interaction.

So you mean you wait for the comfort phase before you reveal more about yourself?

[amarok]

Until you're more experienced than now, yes. You can tell interesting stories, but only when it contributes to the conversation. You shouldn't be talking about you as the main conversation point. If they want to know something, they'll ask.

[locution]

Thanks for the replies guys a big help and really means a lot to me