Social Proof

[perceverance]

This is my only and largest problem. I can't get inside the fucking popular group. It's like I try to chill with them but they don't seem to want to include me in.

What steps should I take to get in the group because all the girls that arnt in that group are fugly and I know that if I got in that group, I would be hooking up with some 8's or 9's.

It's like when I try to start a conversation with one of those dudes, he sort of ignores me as if he were superior or some shit. Help me out here.

[Nick]

Do you like the "popular" guys... or do you just want the babes in the group?

[kolby2011]

You have to bring something to the table... You can't just expect people to accept you into their group. Find mutual interest. Hell the quickest way is to throw a party, but for most people thats not an option.

[perceverance]

I'm just in it for the babes but it would also be nice to hang out with genuinely cool guys like them.

What do you mean by mutual interest bro?

[Nick]

Mutual interest... meaning they need a reason to be interested in you, ie, you need to have value to give to them. They're not going to want to hang with you if you never provide them any fun.

If you're in it just for the babes, you definitely don't need the guys, you just need to be good. Maybe it's just my school, but the "popular" guys here are real dickheads.

[perceverance]

Nah man, in my school, I have yet to see a guy who doesn't hang out with the popular kids who is dating a hot chick, it just doesn't work out in my school, no matter how good you are.

[kolby2011]

Yah because popular girls need the social proof for it to be acceptable, at my school I'm in with the popular crowd that throws parties, and with the jocks, and numerous others. There for I have social proof to go out with just about any chick, because Im known and it wont seem weird if I were to date or hang out with a popular girl. Just put yourself out there, working your way up the ladder to popularity isn't easy it takes time. Become friends with as many people as possible its good to diversify.

[perceverance]

When you say all people, do you mean the nerds too? One of the problems is that I have already tried that strategy of making as many friends as possible and it didn't get me anywhere. Sure I say hi to everyone in the hall and I look like I know everyone but I don't feel that it's helping me get into the popular group.

[crazyman]

Mar 22, 2011 21:02:07 GMT -5 perceverance said:

When you say all people, do you mean the nerds too? One of the problems is that I have already tried that strategy of making as many friends as possible and it didn't get me anywhere. Sure I say hi to everyone in the hall and I look like I know everyone but I don't feel that it's helping me get into the popular group.

I'm having the exact same problem as you. Now, I can talk to some of the 'popular' kids in class without too much worry, but i still haven't gotten anywhere in terms of hangouts or parties etc.

[Adam]

Dude just make friends with one of the popular people. They will be your bridge and as long as you don't fuck up you'll be in in no time.

[kolby2011]

Bro it isn't really as hard as you make it like super1up said make A friend with someone who is in the "popular click", that you genuinely would want to be friends with, and one who you share interests with. The rest will work its self out, that one person will allow you to get your foot in the door.

[Nick]

Mar 22, 2011 20:41:58 GMT -5 perceverance said:

Nah man, in my school, I have yet to see a guy who doesn't hang out with the popular kids who is dating a hot chick, it just doesn't work out in my school, no matter how good you are.

Oh, well it's happened in my school. The guy is popular in the way the word is supposed to be used: well known, but he doesn't hang out at all with the "elite" group of my school. He just attracts the girl completely separately, it's kind of amazing.

I say you have enough social proof as long as you're popular, ie, well known. You don't necessarily have to be in with the "cool" crowd. I can't help you get in either because I've never tried. I strongly dislike them at my school.

[perceverance]

Yeah, well I don't know why I'm not getting bridged in because I'm friends with like 3 people in the popular click but they don't really help me get in. We just talk and text but thats about it.

[kolby2011]

Try to do more out of school shit with those friends, i.e. Go to the movies, just hang out with them, once again you have to put yourself out there, after a while you'll be chillin with them on a regular basis hitting up all the parties, and popular hangout spots

[Slick]

Damn perceverence, you pretty much suffer from the same problem I do. Good luck in improving.